As you can see from my slightly messy photo gallery, today I walked the dogs in the snow. I have to say this is nothing new. Honestly, I do this most mornings. I live in Iowa so we are coming into cold weather. I am not especially fond of the cold. In fact, I cannot tell you how many days I questions what the universe was thinking having me born in this part of the country. Honestly, I have made myself miserable because I love walks in nature but hate cold. Hence, I have never walked in winter and usually find myself loosing my gratitude as I lose my why in life. Let me explain.
I love to move and find the peace and healing that comes with movement, but I am not an athlete. I have issues with depth perception and clumsiness. I can trip over my own feet walking on flat surfaces. So when I cared about what people thought, and let my ego lead the way, avoided certain activities. Especially one's that involved getting sweaty and physical. Also in the last few months, I have been able to have some wonderful cheerleaders in my court, and they have encouraged me to push past that and I have started to realize it was just another story I told myself that held me back. Anyone who has known me for any length of time will confirm this. Yet, I am realizing it was just another way I limited myself, and did not allow a soul let existence and gave into my ego. But lately, I have been trying to live differently. I have been trying to find my why in the feeling not all the details. Most of us find our way in the details and if the details are not perfect then we are disappointed and the story we build does not build gratitude, instead it builds on the story of lack. Yet when we live holistically and fully committed to being present, are just parts or the whole. IF everything does not add up, living holistically and in the moment allows us to let go of the how and just enjoy the part that is actually the wow. For me that is the movement and the peace of the outdoors. I find that the more I focus on that, I end up finding that WHY more quickly. The trick is living in the present moment without judgement on what should be happening and letting all the stories go.
The last few years, I have been working diligently at letting go of many of my old stories. I am not saying it has been easy but it is worth it. And the more I do it, the more I see the abundance that the universe has showered on me. I find that I have more of my why in my everyday life, and don't have to go out and find the extras to love life. It is already right there in the moment. I have wonderful support from friends and family who are cheering me on as pursue a life long dream of helping others find their best life, amazing puppies that look at me and getting me motivated even when I am not sure I really want to be, and honestly, i have more peace in my soul than I ever thought possible. Things are not perfect. I still live in the world with all of its problems and could let that get to me, but I chose not too. I have my personal details that I could let reinforce the old stories. The house is not perfect, we have a St Bernard and Shiba Inu that are blowing coat, and honestly I am not the best housekeeper and never have been. Our bank account could have more in it. I just left a good paying stable job, but I would not go back because I know in my soul I am in the right spot and it is only getting better. I will not give up my why for the old stories. The cultural and personal stories that I developed to survive because of all the things that happened in my life.
Many times I find when I am writing these shorts, that I am faced with my new truth. That going back is not an option. I am daily finding my why and what feeds my soul and doing it in a holistic way. I am living my life fully integrated. I am not a different person anymore based on where I am. Every moment, I am me.... and that is someone that is needed in this world. If you have read to the end, I am assuming something in this message you needed to hear. I want to extend to everyone, that I am here for you if you need help finding your why in a holistic way. I would not be able to say I have found it if not for some amazing people who have been put in my path. Check out the website and see if it resonates. I can work with you too to be able to know you are living your why in every moment. And that is what the world needs more that every to heal. Each one of us embracing their individual essence and bringing it forward in full glory, all parts of ourselves. It is is all lovable even if it is completely failable and human. It is perfectly, imperfect in exactly the way it needs to be in exactly the moment you are in. Much love and light. Cathy
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